ch ch ch Changes....

Overheard in the kitchen

Mid: If I ever have a shed I'm so gonna paint it blue.

Lit: I know, right.

Now I admit for a few moments I was puzzled. Then it dawned on me.
100 wizard of weirdness points for an explanation.
There is a hint later in this post.

Yesterday morning when I woke up Lit I was confused because her entire room had been changed around. And her light bulbs were missing. So I turned on her bathroom light which started the fan. A little while later I went to make sure she was up and heard her in the bathroom so I moved on. At 6:45 I gave her a warning knock and called out that it was getting late. At 6:55, which is when we leave for the bus stop, I opened her door and she was in the shower. I freaked and called out, "what are you doing? It's time to go!" She said, "What! you just woke me up a few minutes ago." So I had to make the 45 minute drive to her school.  Now, she did not wake up properly because the lamp next to her bed was not turned on. Being half asleep myself, I forgot about the bathroom light/fan and thought I heard her in the bathroom. Then I learned that, though I slept through it myself, she was changing her room around at midnight and crashing things around which woke up her Dad who gave her two warnings to go to bed before he took her light bulbs away. So....

Whose fault is it that she missed her bus?

We noticed our cable bill was OUTRAGEOUS and decided to cut back some. Now I don't watch TV a whole lot but after the change I realized I won't be watching it much at all because I lost almost everything I actually watch. TCM; IFC; ID; Science Ch and LOGO....which means my beloved Buffy is no more.....
I still have History International so this was not as bad for me as it was for Littlest who nearly curled into a ball and died because she lost...
the Military Channel and BBC America.....uh oh.....Luckily we didn't have to call 911 because I grabbed the remote and feverishly flipped to On Demand and Thank God....Dr. Who was there...at least for now. Not so the Military Channel so I think she compensated for that by telling me that she is seriously considering joining the Marines after high school.....I guess if you don't have good cable real life is the next best thing.... And hey, oh joy. somehow, we still get Smoking Gun's Worlds Dumbest.. and MTV....

Speaking of cable and changes.
Biggest and DecentGuy are on a very tight budget so they have the most basic cable of all. As a result these two, who listen to bands like, The Adicts and watch movies like Zombie Strippers, have become addicted to......
OPRAH.
Both Of Them.
Now I spent some time watching Oprah back in 1987 when I didn't have cable at all and she came on right at nursing time for this particular child but over the years I lost track of it, what with having choices like History Detectives and Buffy of course. Now she calls me several times a week to ask, "Did you watch Oprah?"  To which I usually say no but it doesn't matter if I missed it because I'm getting ready to hear the entire episode. The last time they were over she was describing a show and DecentGuy said, "oh yeah, that was a good one and started to talk about it to. ?. She even cried when she watched the Tribute show with Naomi and Wynonna Judd singing along to still photo's, which by chance I did happen to catch because I was flipping through channels and was mesmermized by Wynonna's face which always fascinates me because I think she's a robot.........huh....oh...i'm back. I find it hysterical that these two Former Rebels were enthralled with Oprah and Gails camping trip. They really like Gail by the way. They think she's cool.

Anyway,

Recently I wrote about my parenting rules and Middlest's boyfriend who I felt was too old for her but he was alright and I was starting to resign myself to him even though I thought she was resigning herself to him too and then she dumped him. What happy dance? Am not....anyway. Now that she has 5 whole months of high school left she has finally found some friends who aren't creepy and is dating someone she has known since 3rd grade that she has a lot in common with and she is having a wonderful time being a regular teenager. Which means that she stopped coming home at 9: 30 like she did when dating the older guy and now calls me at ten to eleven every weekend and asks if she can stay out later. She is doing her school work..mostly...she is working...she seems to be truly happy for the first time since she started high school...and it's almost over. But I think she has turned a page. She is becoming stronger and more confident in some ways. Interesting to see what other changes this year will bring. Maybe she will even start picking her underwear up off the bathroom floor.

Littlest is in the midst of a serious decision. She goes to an award winning high school that you must audition for. She loves being a part of the creative writing department there and the prestige and opportunities being one of their students gives her. At the same time she has decided that in general she doesn't really love the school any more. She doesn't have friends there that she feel closely connected to. She is tired...very tired...of the rigorous curriculum and amount of time it takes to be a part of the school. It is a huge commitment. A couple weeks ago she refused to get out of bed one morning. She had writing assignments that weren't finished and she was having a meltdown. She said she loves to write but sometimes she "just can't." I think many of us could identify with that. She can't take the pressure of being required to create for a grade. She refuses to do sub-standard just to get by. All of her grades are falling. I let Mid leave this school after 9th grade because she was not committed. She was wasting their time. Littlest has been committed and worked really hard. She doesn't want to anymore. She says she has no life. That she doesn't think she's going to be a writer. She wants to join the Marines and be a psychologist. In the middle of all this one of her pieces was chosen to be in a reading performance that the department does once each quarter. It it isn't easy to get in. Some kids never do. I wondered if this was a sign. A message to her to hang in there. By coincidence Peryl at Parenting Ad Absurdum  just did a post called Daughters of Mothers Who Roar relating to this article -Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior by Amy Chua.... about pushing our kids. Whether we are hard enough on them.  Sometimes I Roar for a few minutes but then my throat gets raw and I just make a cup of tea and read a book instead. Part of me wants to tell her not to blow this gift she was lucky enough to live near. Stick it out and do what you need to do! Why would you throw away this opportunity that many kids would give anything for? Are you crazy? Well, maybe. When she is crying and having meltdowns and her grades are all falling and she is re arranging her room in the middle of the night because she can't rest. I decided to let her make the decision on her own. I'd be lying if I said I would miss dealing with her frustration and the long hours. I also know this. The school requires you to devote yourself to an art area. Like her sister, Littlest can draw. She also has a unique and lovely singing voice and is interested in musical theatre. At our local high school she can try all of these things. Not in a state of the art award winning facility but decently all the same.

What would you suggest as a parent? Insist she get up, get over it and work? Or, it's been 5 years of this. No harm in two years of regular high school to round her out? Don't be afraid to answer a life altering question for a teenager. Apparently one mom isn't enough. She said to ask for input. The decision she makes will be entirely her own .....Believe Me!


Other than that things around her are about the same. This week they all have PMS. Everyone has cried at least once. But this morning when they came in the kitchen they did some Ninja poses followed by a full scale song and dance performance of Little Bunny Fu Fu, hugged each other violently as a grand finale and still made it out the door on time. So as I look around I realize, Ah, of course.



Moon Music





© 2010 All Rights Reserved