Saturday, May 7, 2011

But Does It Define Me?

Surprise! I'm back again already. Which may mean I have a remarkable amount of free time on my hands. Or that I'm not doing other stuff I should be doing. You decide : ) Besides, it wouldn't be a Special Holiday if I didn't mark it with some Really Bad Hokey Poetry!

I am twenty one years
From my body she pours
With a smile they lay her upon me
Take her. She is yours.

A short time freed daughter
A fifteen months wife
Twenty one years of  myself
Now A mother for life

I have done many things. I have not done everything. When I look the choices I have made and ask myself, how have you done? I have to say, Ok. Which as you may know works for me : ) If I ask, what  have I contributed to this world? What is my masterpiece? Did I win a Nobel prize? Did I secure world peace? Did I save the environment, lead a nation to greatness, create art found in the great museums, write the book that defines my generation? Well, hell no.

As some time passed
I considered the choice
I listened to the multitudes
But chose my own voice

I am twenty seven years
When my life I define
Reach for this burden of love
I take her. She is mine.

But I can say to the world, Look, I made you these human beings. The glaze is a little cracked on my first try but it gives it amazing depth and character and I think I completely missed a piece on that second one but it's so beautiful and exceptional the way it is, no one notices and the small one seems like just an adorable trinket at first glance but is so intricate and complicated you can stare at it for hours and never completely figure it out.

I am twenty nine years
Sooner than we thought
But we have no less joy in this
blessing We wrought
Snatched at first breath 
I invoke the divine
Battle the fates for this prize
And win. She is mine.
It still remains to be seen what my actual contribution to the world will accomplish.  Some may say that it is a waste to feel that motherhood is all you have to offer. Well. I don't think it is all I have to offer. But out of everything that I have done and plan to do it is what has real meaning for me. And really,  even if I did change the world, or define my generation in some way, or even just did a kick ass job at whatever I do for a job, all of it is just "something I did."  Anyone else could have done just as well if they had a mind to.
My days and contributions to the world may be transient and whether my accomplishments are unremarkable or remarkable to others,  wordly awards and accolades mean nothing to me.

Whatever they may give,

I am a mother as long as I live.
Besides, who needs a Nobel prize.

Flip the spatula to read more


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  1. I consider being a mother my most valuable contribution. The reward... MY GRANDCHILDREN. They are so worth all my efforts and struggles.


  2. Aw that was the sweetest! I was happy to see you back so soon! :)

  3. It's great! I mentioned how it would be nice to have some solar lighting in the front of our house-I got solar lights that are clear dragonflies and a beautiful blue butterfly that will move with the wind-it's the gifts given from a listening heart that mean the most!

  4. I'm glad you snuck back in with that wonderful piece. Motherhood is the best prize!

  5. I have spatula, hear me roar.

  6. Susan: It wasn't what I might have suggested but the listening worked out rather well! Dragonflies! That sounds pretty: )

    blueviolet: It is for me! One I never would have thought of when I was young...or make that an infant ; )

    Mrs. Tuna: You bet! I can make them run if I threaten to whack them with it too ; )

  7. I love this. Just this morning, my kids were talking about what they want to be when they grow up. Alex (3) wants to be a "flower-hunter." Jack (5) hopes very much to be a Daddy. I couldn't be prouder :).

  8. I had my first child at the age of 21 too. I was too young to really it was hard. My second baby came along when I was 24. I was divorced at 25 and had no idea it would be hard. Frankly, my grandchildren today give me more joy perhaps, but having my own children changed me forever, in a good way. I don't need prizes. My children and grandchildren are my Nobel Prize! Lovely post!

  9. Peryl: I don't blame you! That is the sweetest: ) Particularly since mine want to be an animal hoarder, a starving artist and a Marine ; )

    Linda: Thank you. It was hard starting out that young and I consider it a blessing that my husband and I somehow made it thru when so many young marriages don't. It was hard enough together and I can't imagine doing it alone. My children changed my life completely and no doubt it was for the better : )

  10. This post is wonderful. Happy Mother's Day (late!) to you too. I can't imagine having my kids in my twenties, I was such a wild child, but I imagine you rise to the occasion, yes? On the other hand, having them in my mid and late 30's wasn't my best idea either. I couldn't imagine then, me now, in my 50's wrangling teenagers and hot flashes. I would be a much cooler, fun, together mom if I were a decade younger. But that's the way my cookie crumbled, and I suppose I wouldn't change a thing if I could.
    I really, really loved your poem. You said so much with so few words. Beautiful. Hope your Mother's Day was a good one too.


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