Thursday, November 10, 2011

Am I Quibbling?

Want to know how I used to amuse myself before I began blogging? Here is an example.

 The following are a series of emails I have been exchanging with Bleeps Department Store.
If you sign up for their sale alert emails they offered to give you a 10% online or $5.00 in store discount on your next purchase. So I went for it. Why not?

First I got this:

Thank you for signing up to receive Bleep.com Sale Alerts!

To welcome you to Sale Alerts, you will receive two special offers:

- A $5 coupon to use in our stores
- A 10% off Promo Code to use online

THESE SPECIAL OFFERS WILL ARRIVE IN A SEPARATE E-MAIL WITHIN 10 DAYS
. As a subscriber to our e-mail Sale Alerts, you'll hear about our biggest sales, shipping deals, credit offers and so much more! Every week, we'll send you up-to-the-minute info on our great sale prices. And, you'll periodically receive other great savings offers, like these:

- FREE Standard Shipping on your order (with a minimum purchase)
- EXTRA SAVINGS when you Checkout with your Bleep Charge Card
- NEW Markdowns in our Clearance Department
- BIG savings in every department

Plus, every e-mail includes an easy opt-out feature, so you can choose to unsubscribe* at any time. Please note, you may receive a sale alert before your welcome offer.

Thanks again for subscribing to Bleeps Sale Alerts! Stay tuned for more great savings, coming your way soon!
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Then on November 8th, I sent this:
Hello,

I signed up for email alerts on October 21 and was supposed to receive an online discount or $5.00 off coupon for in store by email within ten days but have never received anything.  Can you give me any info? Thank you.
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Then I received this:
Dear Ms. G,
Thank you for contacting Bleeps regarding our Sale Alerts promotion. I appreciate the opportunity to review your concern.

I regret that you did not receive an e-mail containing your $5 coupon and 10% promo code. Please allow 7-10 business days for these offers to arrive. To ensure timely delivery of our e-mails, please add Bleeps.com to your list of approved senders and check your spam blocker. We are unable to send a duplicate e-mail or issue physical coupons.

If the designated timeframe passes and you still do not receive these offers, we have the following alternatives:-You may place an online order and we will be happy to credit 10% off the order and honor free standard shipping when you e-mail us the order number.

-You may make a purchase in-store using your Bleeps Charge and we will credit $5 to your account when you e-mail us the numbers at the top of your purchase receipt (beginning with the purchase date). Please also include your billing address so we can locate your account.

The $5 coupon and the 10% promo code are not valid on the purchase of Bleeps Gift Cards. E-mail addresses previously signed up for e-mail Sale Alerts are not eligible to receive the $5 coupon and the 10% promo code. Also, the $5 coupon and the 10% promo code cannot be used together. If you choose to place a Bleeps.com order, priority shipping and the shipping surcharges are excluded from this offer. We are unable to process credits to credit cards other than Bleeps for in-store purchases.I hope these options are suitable and I sincerely apologize for any inconvenience you experienced because the offers were not received.

We appreciate the time you took to contact us and look forward to serving you again at Bleeps.com.
Sincerely,
****** S.
eService Advocate
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------So I answered with this:

Hi ***** S,

 Thank you for responding. As I mentioned in my original email, I registered for email alerts on October 21. That would be 13 business days, not including the 21st which was a Friday.  Not to mention the offer said nothing about business days, but no big deal. The email is not in my Spam filter.  I was able to check it because I always forget to empty it. The Advertising Alerts somehow managed to get through just fine. Perhaps they will be directed to my Spam box in the future.  I do not have a Bleeps Charge nor do I wish to get one. I also only rarely shop online as there is a Bleeps store only 10 minutes from my house. I was planning on doing some shopping there this morning. Perhaps my car will be directed somewhere else in the future.

I appreciate your taking the time to contact me in return.

Sincerely,
 Ms. G
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 And Got This:

I appreciate the opportunity to assist you with your $5 coupon. I can certainly see why you want to take advantage of this great offer. I know saving money is important for all of us, and shopping with Bleeps is a great way to stretch those dollars.

To ensure timely delivery of our e-mails, please add Bleeps.com to your list of approved senders and check your spam blocker. We are unable to send a duplicate e-mail or issue physical coupons.
While it may be difficult to receive negative information about our services, it is important for us to become aware of the recent challenges you experienced. We make every effort to ensure that your online shopping experience is a pleasant one. I regret this was not the case for you.

Your disappointment is understandable. Please know that your comments have been heard at our corporate office and that we are dedicated to improving our website.
Mrs. G, you are a valued customer and we appreciate the time you took to contact us. We hope that you will allow us another opportunity to provide you with the excellence in service that you truly deserve.

We appreciate the time you took to contact us and look forward to serving you again at Bleep.com.


****** W.
eService Advocate
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Ok. In my draft box I have this reply:
Hello ***W,

Thank you for taking the time to contact me over $5.00.
I'm sorry if I seem grumpy, I know it's not a huge issue but considering I have spent nearly $343.94 at Bleeps during the past month and approximately $600.00 since August, I did find it rather annoying. After all just think how much that $5.00 coupon could have stretched those dollars.That $5.00 might pay for half a pair of socks or the lining in some underpants at your store.

I quote myself from the previous email, "The email is not in my Spam filter.  I was able to check it because I always forget to empty it. " My email client sends Spam directly to a folder, if it even catches it, which it usually doesn't. The only specific filters I have created would go into effect if Bleeps was trying to date me or Love Me Long Time. Which they obviously don't intend to do. But that's ok. Don't worry yourself. I'll get over it eventually. After all I know it's not me. It's you.

Luv Your Friend,
 Ms. G
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What do you think?
Should I send it?
Am I Quibbling? ; )

I am leaving tomorrow on my Obviously Much Needed Vacation! I will not be taking any media devices with me...which is probably a swell idea too. If I miss you today I'll catch ya when I get back! For now I better get busy ( Driving back to Bleeps Dept. Store because the Associate forgot to take the alarm tag off the coat I bought yesterday) because I have just spent about $50.00 worth of my time on $5.00


I've used this one before but it fits...

Moon Music


© 2011 All Rights Reserved

16 comments:

  1. You could send it just for kicks, but these types of people don't generally speak Irony, so you might inadvertently cause someone's head to explode, or at least make their chin feel all weird for a couple of hours. Still - good job.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Girl, you just need to call up corporate and they'll fix it right away! Email takes too long!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I laughed out loud at this one! Probably because I have a pretty good idea about which store you're referring to! I agree with blueviolet - just call corporate!

    And enjoy your much needed vacation!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'd send it AND call corporate! Have fun on your vacation!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Okay, I totally cracked up at this! I've so been there. That said, typically I'd just let it go...but in this case, I'd keep sending the emails, because, well, it's not only f'ing hysterical and great blog fodder, but you might also make someone there wake up and pay attention (maybe).

    ReplyDelete
  6. You know what?

    This sadly resembles much what my life was like, also.

    What makes this post so precious.

    xo

    Gotta love blogger.com

    ReplyDelete
  7. Allison: hee hee..It's so tempting. But then they might ban me from the store and I'll miss out on all the personal ineptitude.

    blueviolet: If I call corporate I'll probably end up with 'Peggy' like the Discover Card commercials.

    MDSA: I'll tell you which one it is. I like their stuff but every time I go there I end up with an issue!

    Teresa: I might wait till I get back so they think I'm done and give them a false sense of security ; )

    MMN: I run a business where I take my customer service seriously. I recently sent a customer a second order for free because I missed her email changing it before I shipped the first. Not honoring what you promised is unacceptable, no matter how small. And makes the lives of cutomers like me way too much fun ; )

    Alexandra: My local newspaper was very relieved ; )

    ReplyDelete
  8. Lying on the floor of my office laughing my 'bleep' off as I read this - girl you so need to go on a holiday.

    So glad we don't have this store in Oz

    ReplyDelete
  9. Go for it, it's great! Have fun on your vacation, too!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Fi: And I am. In 62 minutes!

    Ms. A: If I don't come back and you hear tell of of an old hermit woman who roams the
    mountains with a book in one hand and a cup of tea in the other... that will be me : )

    Charlotte: The moon is full and my send finger is itchy ; )

    ReplyDelete
  11. half a pair of socks or underwear lining.... forget snickering, that's worth a guffaw!!!! i wish i had 5 dollars for every time i waste $50.00 worth of my time over 5 dollars.

    hope you enjoy your time away!!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Ugh. But thanks for the laugh! Have a great get-away!

    ReplyDelete
  13. See, blogging is WAY more relaxing - right? ;)

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  14. Oh!! Too funny. Gee Whiz! They should give you way more than five bucks now! My gosh, that's crazy. Your patience is impressive. I would have given up. Lol. Enjoy your vacation!

    ReplyDelete
  15. OMygosh. I think their gonna send you the same automated email. I don't think I would have emailed them the first time. I sign up for stuff want to unsubscribe and begin to delete all msg. LOL Enjoy your vacation

    ReplyDelete

Just Humor Me....

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